


Still Here

by singmetosleep (ohmyheichou)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, let's be real guys there's no way sasuke wouldn't dream of better times
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 04:34:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13674369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmyheichou/pseuds/singmetosleep
Summary: Every night, Sasuke dreams.





	Still Here

Every night, Sasuke dreams.

He is five again, and there is nothing and no one he loves better in the world than his older brother Itachi. Itachi is out on a mission today, but that's okay, because Itachi is the best and he always comes back safely. For now, Sasuke is content to play in the backyard with his stuffed dinosaur and some kunai. His mother watches over him with a smile, and he feels loved and protected. As he plays, he accidentally cuts open his dinosaur with a kunai, and even though he knows he is too old for it, he starts crying. His mother is at his side immediately, shushing him and looking him over for injuries. She quickly figures out that it is the dinosaur, not Sasuke, who is hurt, and she gently wipes his tears away. _Sasuke,_ she says with a fond smile, _it's okay. I can fix Mr. Dinosaur right up. You go wash up, and he'll be good as new when you're done. Okay? Besides, your older brother will be coming home soon._ Sasuke brightens up at that, and dashes off.

On his way out of the bathroom, he runs into his father, who has just come home from work. Sasuke apologizes, but he pouts that it's just father and not Itachi. His father smiles wryly at him and says, _I'm not very exciting, am I?_ Sasuke is happy his father is here, of course, but he agrees because _Itachi nii-san is the best!_ And it's true that while Sasuke loves his parents, it's Itachi he runs to when he's scared, at least when Itachi is home. No matter what happens, he can trust that Itachi will always be there for him.

 

Every night, Sasuke walks through a nightmare.

The house is empty and cold, as it has been for years now. Like in his dream, he starts with the garden. What was bright and lively in his dream is now dead or dying, bereft of his mother's touch, much like Sasuke himself. He stares sightlessly at the training posts, which are now overgrown with weeds, before he turns and goes back inside. He pauses by That Man's room. He has never set foot in that room, and he never will. It's empty, anyway. The ANBU had come and cleared it all out shortly after That Night - maybe looking for evidence of some sort, signs of Itachi's madness, clues to where he went. They didn't find anything, but it wouldn't matter even if they had. Everyone is gone and it is too late for Sasuke.

He doesn't go back to his own room. Instead he finds his way to his parents' room. When his family was alive, he rarely came in here, but now he likes to imagine he can smell his mother's perfume, lingering near her vanity. The reality is not nearly so sweet. The reality is that the room smells stale, and he can still see the stain where his parents' corpses lay. He's tried everything to get it out, but he's never quite managed it, as though the house itself would like to remind Sasuke of his duty. As though he could forget.

 

And in the morning...

Sasuke is twelve again. He is on a team with a stupid girl who fawns over him without understanding anything about him, and a stupid boy who demands attention and respect despite having done nothing to earn it. His teacher is a lazy man who doesn't care about any of them, despite all of his talk about comrades and never leaving anyone behind, and who has yet to teach him anything useful. Sasuke is surrounded by people, all of whom try to pretend that he belongs, but he has never felt so alone. All they do is remind him of all that he's lost.

  

If he could, Sasuke would dream forever.


End file.
